As you can see, I'm tiiiiireeeed. I'm yawning a lot today, and it's really uncomfortable because I have a sore throat, so it hurts really bad when I yawn.
So, from my surgery, there's a scar next to the stoma that's SUPPOSED to be stitched up. But one day when my mommy and I were ever-so-gently ripping off the wafer, the top layer of stitches came out and revealed a nasty, pussy, oozy scar. But YESTERDAY, in our quest to take the sticker off in the shower, all the pus came out, revealing a scar that's like, half an inch deep. You can actually see the second layer of stitches. Like, inside of me. It's disgustinggggg. And so, whenever my bag leaks, it leaks into the scar because it's right next to the stoma, it's like a hole, and we can't put anything by it in fear of infecting it, and that would suck. And hurt. So now, I'm so afraid of crap leaking in to my scar, that all day I either sit up a little bit with my right knee up, or lean to my left. And I sleep on my left side all night, which can get uncomfortable, but it's worth it.
I always think something's leaking. This morning, I woke up and emptied my best friend that I really don't like that much, and there was YELLOWISH STUFF BY THE SCAR AREA. So, angrily I called my mommy in to the bathroom where I was sitting on the toile with my poop under me in the water, and I said, "LOOK! I was on my left side ALL NIGHT and it STILL LEAKS!" To which my mommy leaned down to look at it a little and was like, "Um, Casey? Could it be just stuff from the inside of the scar?" Which made more sense. A lot more sense. So I didn't go insane, but it's SO UNCOMFORTABLE when I poop because it always feels like it's going everywhere, like splattering, and I always think it's leaking in to the scar. And it might be and it might not be, but you know, I'm leaving this sticker on till I know for sure because it freaking HURTS when we have to pull it off.
Till scars are stitched and nothing leaks,
Casey
2 comments:
My god do I remember the oozing cut of abdominal surgery. Your writing brought it all back to me (I will thank you for that later).
If it was me I, too, would panic constantly that crap was actually entering back into my body at the open wound. When my colon perforated, that's exactly what happened and I was sick, and lethargic and ...hey, wait a minute! That sounds like you too! I am beginning to think that most people do not realize the joy of going to the bathroom without complications.
Nasty pains are to be expected over the few months after a major surgery. Just remember that is part of the improvement. I hope you're okay by now, and the surgery didn't leave you with permanent scar. =)
Terry Bayer
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